


Help Me

by yuki2810



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 17:31:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21275015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuki2810/pseuds/yuki2810
Summary: When will the pain end? When can he stop crying? Is he going to wait for someone to shot him in the head, or is he going to take matters into his own hands? Ash is having these thoughts in his head, and there's one person who'll take him out and save him without even knowing it.





	Help Me

Ash gazes at the small blade in his hand, and his reflection stares right back. He moves to hold the sharp knife against his pale neck. It will take only one slit for it all to end, merely one and he will be able to stop the nightmare. The blonde wants, no, he needs for it to end. The horror, the torture, the pain, the tears will be no more. The edge rests a bit more firmly on his neck, a few beads of blood flow out. Just one slit and he no longer have to worry about any of it. No more having to watch his back when he's out in the street, no more wake up screaming amid the night from night terrors, and no more crying. That sounds good, very good. Just on-  
He hears the bedroom door opening; someone was up and awake now. He still has a chance to end it, but the male sat there listening to whoever it was moving around. Each sound was calming him down, bringing Ash out of the state he was previously in effortlessly. Taking a couple of deep breaths before pushing himself up and out of the tub. Looking into the mirror, he realized that the cut on his neck was more profound than he thought, blood still creeping out every once in a while. It's nothing too severe, it will be hard to come up with an excuse for it, but the male could hide it with his hoodie.  
"Good morning, Ash." the raven head said from the kitchen, possibly cooking some breakfast. His heart did leap a bit but he smoothly recovered from it, of course, it's the one person that he doesn't want to know about his weakness, that he go so low to do things such as self-harm or trying to kill himself. "Hey." the blond's head snaps up, scared that the innocent male might have figured something out. But he merely arranges a full plate of food in front of him. "Eat up."  
"Thanks." The food Eiji makes for him never fails to warm him up and overflows his heart with something he never thought he felt again since his brother had left for the military all those years ago. He always seems to make everything better. Everything that was troubling him had just dissolved into dust; everything was alright once again.  
"Hey." the older gazes into his eyes, Ash swears that he's looking right into his soul. Eiji always seems to be able to read and know what Ash is thinking efficiently; the blonde is sometimes scared that his weaknesses are left bare for the Japanese male to see, however, Eiji makes him feel safe. Like everything is going to be ok. "Is something wrong?"  
"Hmm? What do you mean?"  
"You seem... off today." his sincere umber eyes continue to saw open his soul. Eiji was one of the few that genuinely felt worried about him which makes him felt like he means something.  
"I'm alright, just groggy from sleep I guess. Why, are you worried?" Ash teased the other fully knowing that he is.  
Eiji narrows his eyes at him unconsciously. The blonde knew from the beginning that the brunet was a fighter type even if he never fought before. He's the type that will fight for his friends to protect them, the kind that will get himself killed to keep them alive. "Of course I am, you big idiot. I am older than you, so obviously I have to look out for you," the raven head huff out his chest, giving his appearance a slightly bigger and bolder look. That just made Ash laugh, the Japanese male was too much of a harmless dog than anything.  
"Of course, big brother."  
Eiji had once again saved him. This time from Ash, himself.

**Author's Note:**

> If you are having dark thoughts and want to be heard, please don't be afraid to voice it out; there's someone else out there who will be more than willing to listen to you and pull you out. Remember you're not alone and you will be missed.


End file.
